Great Uncle Fred? My sister and me have been fishing loads of times, in the sea for mackerel, in a little river for trout and in a big river for salmon. Each time she catches loads of fish and I have never caught a single thing, not even a tiddler. I am just as good at fishing as she is. How do I catch a fish? (George, Autumn 2007)

Be lucky. The best salmon fisherman I know - the most elegant, knowledgeable, best prepared - went 17 years without catching a salmon. True. It happens. Pure bad luck. Still, it might be that your sister (please say, "My sister and I"), it might be that she is rather more friendly (and pretty?) than your doubtless somewhat grumpy self and the people who help you find spots to fish, perhaps find better spots for her. Perhaps? Also, it has long been thought, but never proved, that fish, like men, find women attractive and will always be more likely to go for the woman`s than the man`s line, given the choice. This theory, of course, might have been dreamed up by a man peeved at the greater success of a female companion who was - could this be true? - better at fishing than he was. Might your sister, despite what you say, actually be better at fishing than you? I only ask. Actually, I think that you have had a small run of bad luck and this has made you nervous and anxious, and therefore less likely to catch a fish: fish do notice anxiety, and avoid it. See if you can arrange a fishing trip without your sister. I am sure you`ll be lucky. Relax, George, relax. Tight lines!

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