Great Uncle Fred? Mum took me to a concert last night. I thought a concert meant a show with funny songs and performing pigs but it didn’t. It meant two hours of classical music, just sitting there. I quite like classical music when it’s on in the car but just sitting there, with nothing to look at except the same old thing for two hours! At least if it’s an opera, things change and there’s a story and acting and stuff, but this! Numb bum, or what! My question is, how do you listen to live music, with no words, sitting down, and not get a numb bum? (Jack, Autumn 2007)

Hmm. Well, I love listening to live music with no words sitting down... It must be well-played, of course, if it’s not, it’s torture...but I do not know if I actually do anything to help me enjoy it. I just do enjoy it... I’ll think about it... OK, here are some thoughts: The more you know the better it gets. (Do you know the difference between a sonata, a symphony and a concerto? It’s worth finding out but don’t get bamboozled.) Try to stay awake but do not worry if you fall asleep. Do not worry, generally. Do not worry. If you are having trouble concentrating, get into the music by letting your imagination supply an image of the outdoor scene that the music suggests. See the music in terms of colours and shapes, if you feel like it. Listen out for themes, repetitions, variations and what is absolutely new. Try to get an idea of the structure of the thing. Keep an ear out for the different instruments. Think about why the composer uses each instrument as he does. And keep on considering the matter. Ask yourself, perhaps, what does the sound of a violin look like? what colour is clarinet music? if you could touch the notes that emerge from a harpsichord, what would they feel like? Listen with your heart. This is what matters above all. Music is the art of arts because music goes straight to the heart, or it is meant to. Hear the melody, the harmony, the rhythm. Watch out for the tempo, the dynamics, the colour, the form, the balances, the textures. (If these words mean nothing to you, make them mean something: get your books out, laddie!) In short, keep thinking, keep feeling. Participate. It’s not like square eyes in front of the telly. It’s a conversation and it’s meant to be bracing and enlivening. But it’s the heart that matters. Listen with your heart. Got it? Be alert. This country needs lerts.

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